New Ways to die in Korea:

So the time has come to update the list. A couple of months ago I wrote a blog about the dangers of living in Korea and I have recently been informed of a couple more things that just may kill you in this country. Before I inform you of my newest discoveries I will give you a quick briefing on updates from the last "killers' I wrote about.
1.The Red Pen: So, in our speaking classes we have to fill out score sheets about kids performanaces. As a teacher, I always seem to have a red pen on hand. Kids Freak out when you write ther name in red, it is pretty hilarious. They will rummage through their bag for a black pen and lunge towards you yelling "teacher, my name, this color, no red". I have one student who thinks the whole thing is looney, and she always tells me "Write my name in red...three times". (It seems as though that would be triple death, but she is miraculously resilient and is still alive and kickin').
2. Fan Death: the latest explanation is that fan death kills you by freezing you to death...hmmmm
3. Flower Death: Well I am pretty certain that I killed my orchid, so you can all stop losing sleep over it maybe killing me in my sleep.

OK so the newest: In Korea kids learn in their science books that it is very dangerous to sail to far out to sea, because if you end up on a ship in the middle of the ocean there is no oxygen. What is it with Koreans fear of lack of oxygen and suffocation? The only explanation I can think of for this phenomena is that there are no trees nearby to take up CO2, but really osmosis should take care of any unequal distribution, right? When my kids told me this I was not really sure how to respond other than, "huh, I have never heard of that before". So if you come to visit me in Korea be sure to splurge for a plane ticket, because you might suffocate if you try and take a boat here...
My second new discovery is also a way you suffocate in Korea, except this is something that actually does happen. People in Korea eat live octopus. I have never seen it with my own two eyes but it is rather common I hear, I know some people who have done it. It sounds a little creepy to me, apparently as you are eating it squirms around and tries to wiggle its way off the plate (I don't blame it). Personally I could never even be at the same table where it was happening. In any case, if you do choose to sample this meal you have to know what you are doing....or you may bite the dust. If you do not chew properly, or enough, the suction cups on the tenticals will stick to your throat and suffocate you. Who ever heard of such a thing? I can't imagine octopus (especially raw/live octopus) ever tasting good enough to risk your life in order to eat it!!! I prefer a safe burrito myself.

In other news, last night I had my first experience at a real Korean spa. What a crazy experience. Korean spas are famous for exfoliating scubs. After soaking in tubs, saunas and steam rooms (one was 92 degrees C) you lye down on a table and a mostly naked Korean woman gets to work on you, scrubbing off all your dead skin. Koreans are not shy at all. They have no shame in nakedness, which I have experienced in the shower room of my gym...but this was a whole new level. So there I lye for about 20 minutes while a complete stranger who was topless scrubbed every single part of my body, except my face. It actually felt really good though. I have never felt so clean and my skin has never been so smooth.
I posted some pics of my kiddos from last term. We got new schedules and I am teaching mostly older kids now, I think it will be a lot better.

My Korean Name: 제 나

In school all of the children have English names, which they get to choose themselves. We have some really good ones like Bush. (He didn't want to be George, but wanted to name himself after good ol' W) Some teachers have given kids really great names like Tyrone, and inevitably we have loads of Lisas, Sarahs and Alexs. Really, Engish speakers could not be more lingua-centric than making kids choose English names so we don't have to try and pronounce and remember their Korean ones. I am not sure if lingua-centric is a word, but if it's not it should be because it's a pretty good description of most individuals who speak English.
Yesterday some of my kids asked me what my Korean name was. I told them I didn't have one, and so they made it their duty to give me one. One of my favorite llittle kiddos deemed me 제 나, pronounced je na which is not really a Korean name I don't think, but whatever...they all call me teacher all the time anyways.

The Irony of Girls Climbing Weekend

Last weekend I had a fantastic and ironic weekend. Some girls from Korea on the rocks organized a "girls climbing weekend". This ofcourse caused some drama on the kotr forum because anytime girls try and do a girls climbing weekend it does for some reason. I am not sure why it is so hard to understand why girls would want to organize such a thing. First of all it encourages us to push ourselves harder and reminds us that we can do it on our own. Furthermore it's just really fun to hang out with all girls and climb...but we realized you can not take the guys you know with you, but others will inevitably be there.
We went down South to Busan and met up with everyone. On Saturday we made a delicious breakfast and then went out to climb. The crag was filled with Korean men, who insisted on trying to tell us what to do and how to climb. The irony was a little funny for awhile, but ended up getting just plain annoying when they would not leave us alone and then critisized the way some gilrs were belaying...mind you I have seen multiple Korean's deck at the climbing gym due to bad belaying technique.
Really all of that would have been fine and dandy, but it got a lot worse. During the last climb of the day a crazy drunk guy decided to make an appearance. I was climbing and I heard a lot of raquet below me. When I got down I found out that drunky McDrunkerson told the other girls he was a model and then pulled down his pants and asked for sex. We quickley packed up our stuff while the creepo continued to pull down his pants again. As we were leaving he reached out and touched one of the girls, she then preceeded to smack him across the face with her cooler causing him to fall to the ground. My first instinct was to make sure he stayed down so I wacked him with my full waterbottle and we all ran. Girls weekend quickly escalated from a pleasant day of climbing to beating up a drunk Korean man...huh that's funny.
Despite all this, it was a fantastic weekned. It was really great to meet people that I felt as though I really connected with and reminded me of my girl friends from home. I work with all guys and after awhile the testasterone overload becomes a little much to handle....
The pictures are some of the many Korean men we encountered who tried telling us how to climb.

For the love of god, get out of my way!!!!

I am going to preface this little rant with the following; I love Korean people, but some of the things they do make me CRAZY.
I think one of the most common phrases I mumble under my breathe here in Korea is "get out of my way!!!!" You know that car that pulls out right in front of you and then puts along at 10 mph below the speed limit? This feeling of irritation is how I feel in Korea except it is not a phenomena that occurs only in the car, but rather all the time. In the store, at the gym, on the subway, in the elevator, at the coffee shop...you name it and I promise you Koreans are in my way. It does not matter if no one else is on the sidewalk, a Korean will find a way to get in your way. Riding my bike makes me a little nuts, in the US when you ring your little bell people move out of your way, but not in Korea. They will remain in you path until you are about to run them over and then they give you a surprised, apoligetic look, even though they have been watching you approach for at least 15 seconds without moving. I am a bit befuddled as to why this is the way it is. I do know they learn it from a young age though, because I have definitely bumped a young child on rollerblades who disregarded my bell and stepped out in front of my bike. At the gym women will stand in a group chatting and completely block the exit, even if one looks up and sees me obviously trying to escape, they remain in my path. To make matters more frustrating I don't speak very much Korean and "get out of my way" (or a more polite equivalent) is not in my reservoir of basic conversation. I think that's one I should look up. Most of the time I can laugh at these moments of aggravation...but I have those days when I have to think back to what I learned in Buddhist meditation in order to restrain from yelling "get out of my way", and instead think to myself, "loving kindness".

A trip to the beach...

Last weekend Rachel, our friend Greg and I took a trip to Mangsang beach. I was so excited to get out in the sun and play in the ocean that I forgot to pack my umbrella. Low and behold, upon arrival it was definitely raining. One thing about Koreans and rain; they don't believe in getting wet from it. (I even saw a guy on a run carrying his umbrella the other day) So there we were standing outside a hotel in the rain trying to find our friend Greg who had arrived earlier. An old woman looked over at us, walked over and handed us a pink umbrella...god forbid we get a little damp. When we got in the taxi to leave we tried to give the umbrella back, but the woman said it was for us to keep...I am sure she thought we were crazy for not having one (maybe you melt if you are Korean). We found Greg and a hotel room which was Korean style, meaning there is no bed and you sleep on the floor....and it cost more than 10 nights in Southeast Asia. We ended up having lots of fun in the rain, and even got some sun the following day. We had a great time laughing at the Koreans running for cover everytime it started to rain. Another interesting thing about Koreans at the beach is that they all swim in their clothes. I could not imagine playing in the ocean all day in jeans and a t-shirt...it sounds downright miserable actually.
We did not see any other forgieners the entire time we were there, which turned us into a little bit of a spectical. Rachel and I were offered a spot on a a toy raft taking on the waves. All the Korean's fell off and we commandeered the thing, until we realized one of the commandees was a one-armed Korean. Stealing a one-armed man's flotation device could only result in bad karma, so we gave it back. Good times in Korea....