To be wierd, or not to be....

Are all people who come to Korea weird before they arrive, or do you progressively become more strange from being here? That is the question.....my question.
From the moment I arrived it was rather obvious that most of the foreigners you meet in Korea are, well, a little "off". This is a judgement from my perspective, assuming I am somewhat normal, you can make your own judgments based on that statement. In any case I have been a little worried lately that its not that weird people come to Korea, its that Korea makes you weird, and I think I am right. I have comprised a whole theory on the phenomena:
It seems to me that most non-Korean people on the penninsula fit into one or more of the following categories:
1. trying to make money, fast: usually the most normal
2. running from something: a little less normal
3. too socially akward to function at home: weirdo
Now picture a "spectrum of weirdness" made out of the above groups. Luckily, Korea does not make everyone weirder, if you are on the stranger side of the spectrum you actuallly become more normal. The reason for this is because all of the above groups of people are forced to intermingle and be friends through default, because we all speak English. In order for this social system to work, the more normal people (such as myself ofcourse) have to move down on the spectrum while the oddballs move upwards to meet in the middle area. I am not sure I am a fan of the middle of the spectrum because if I am going to be anywhere on a weird spectrum I would prefer to be on the more normal third of it. So this is my predicament... am I going to be socially akward when I get home? OK just kidding about that last part, I am not too worried about it. I am quite excited to come home and not be on the weird spectrum at all though. Luckily here in Korea I have found some others with whom I can stay clear of that sketchy middle area though.

The Korean way, or the highway

No matter what you are doing; eating, drinking, walking climbing, or shopping, you are probably doing it wrong. In Korea it seems that without fail I cannot make it through a day without someone telling me I am doing something wrong and showing me the proper way to go about it. At times I can handle being told to do things the Korean way, other times I just want to poke my eye out. I remember when I first got here going to the store to buy things for my apartment and having the woman at E-mart remove the broom I had carefully chosen from my cart and replacing it with the one she thought I should buy. I tried to convince her to let me buy my original choice but she was not having it and not wanting to waste anymore breathe over it I decided not to argue with the lady. I figured she was a crazy old woman and that I should just do what she said. Throughout the eight months of living here I have come to realize that the broom was only the beginning. It seems that no matter what I do people have to come up to me and point out that I am not doing things their way, which apparenly means I am doing them the wrong way. The best part is that they usually try to tell me in Korean, which doesn't work well for either of us, but when it comes down to it, whether I understand them or not, they don't give up until I am doing whatever it is the "right way". Sometimes they even give you a choice; "Would you like your burger cut in half", and when you respond with "no thanks", they repy with "I think cut in half, better". When your burger arrives is become apparent that you did not make the correct choice because your burger is in two pieces. Even in subway, a restaurant known for "a sandwhich built your way" did not give me the choice of what I wanted, except for certain ingrediants. Things like lettuce and tomato went in without question, because all sanwhiches have lettuce and tomoto.
Saturday night I was asleep in a hotel room with some friends at a ski resort. At 4;30 in the morning we heard a knock upon the door and before anyone got up to see who was there, the door opened and a yelling Korean stuck his head in. We were all very confused and came to the conclusion that it was a security guard reprimanding us for forgetting to lock the door which apparently is unacceptable and warrants a 4:30 wake up call. So much in this country seems to revolve around this black and white, right and wrong way of thinking, without much room for independent thought. Sometimes it entertains me, but at 4:30 in the morning it makes feel like I am going crazy, or maybe that I just live in a REALLY weird place. I guess it should not be a surprise after spending the last 8 months producing little English robots in a place that does not seem to encourage critical thinking...ever. Wow that was quite a rant, but being woke up at 4:30 AM sparked an annoyance in me that those of you who have woken me up before can probably imagine.

Orphan Christmas Party

I know that title may sound bad, not we did not auction off Korean orphans for Christmas. My friends Rick and Adrianne generously invited all of us without families to their house to have a Christmas feast. A wonderful time was had by all. When we first walked in we found Rick and Adrianne in the kitchen reading the instructions on how to cook a turkey. It was quite funny and we all threw in our 2 cents on the matter and came off as being smart asses. My friend Amanda (fellow New Mexican) and I made tamales in order to celebrate the way we do back home (my parents were nice enough to bring masa and husks when they came to visit). I had a minor freak out the day before when I realized that shortening was not a common ingredient in Korea and could not think of a suitable substitute other than lard which I presume would be equally interesting to find. Luckily I found it after an hour or so of fretting over it. I also made bizcochitos which were the most expensive cookies I have ever made since the anise rang in at $13....but what the heck it was Christmas. It is amazing the prices you will pay when you have been away for so long. Their fridge was packed with more eggnog than you can image, another exciting food when in Korea, which I have decided specializes in all of the worst beverages ever. No Korean beverages wer consumed at the party though. My parents also brought me a 6 pack of Mirror Pond which was enjoyed by Rach myself and Rick, another Mirror Pond-worthy individual from Oregon. We played Cranium and laughed a lot. All in all we ate, drank and were merry. I got to spend the night with my favorite people in Korea, what more could ask for on "Christmas"? It is strange how much more I have been in the Christmas spirit here than I ever am at home (thats not saying much, but still). I guess it is just something familar that reminds you of home. I was even really excited about the fireplace the contructed out of carboard. Well in any case I have another Christmas celebration on the the actual day with the people from work. 2 Christmas in a week....assa (Korean word for cool). I wish you all the best for the holiday season!

Making Kimchi!!!!!

It's kimchi season in Korea and today I participated in my first Kim Jong. In other words, English that is, I made kimchi... a lot of it. Every winter Koreans spend a day preparing the kimchi that they will eat for the rest of the year. Our friend Yun hi invited Rachel and I to join her this year. I had no idea what I was in for. Kimchi making is like everything else in Korea, there is no point in doing it if you are not going to go all out, so it is quite an ordeal. We walked in to find the biggest bowl I have ever seen, filled with kimchi sauce. We worked on cutting up the veggies to mix in and then started the process of actaully making the kimchi. Yun hi had at least 60 pounds of cabbage in her living room. The three of us worked togther to coat it all in sauce and put it in the bin for fermentation. The red bin sitting next to me in the picture was full of saucy cabbage (I like the sound of that). Rachel and I just kept saying "I cannot believe how much kimchi this is!" when Yun hi informed us that this was about a 6 month supply, that she was going to make more in the next couple days. It made me think of chile roasting season back in NM and how any non-New Mexican would probably have the same reaction to me loading 2 burlap sacks of green chile in the car to take home and roast. I like kimchi and all, but I think I would rather eat ridiculous amoounts of green chile. On the other hand, kimchi is good for your health, I don't knwo if green chile looks like as much of a badass as this little kimchi dude.

In the spirit of Chanukah, this blog goes out to all those Jewish people I know and is dedicated to my Uncle Stu.
What does it mean to be Jewish? I mean, my grandparents were Jewish and raised my father with the religion, but I have never really practiced it. Luckily my elementary students cleared it all up for me. I had quite a few classes that were reading stuff about WWII and the Holocaust and so I asked the kids what “Jewish” meant. What is a Jew? Without fail every single class came up with the exact same definition: “Really rich and smart people”. My reply was always “yes, often times they are well off and intelligent, but what specifically makes a Jewish person different than so many other people in the world?” Blank stares were always my response. So, since I am not rich, and only consider myself of average intelligence I am wondering if I am barred from being Jewish in Korea. Maybe they wouldn’t even believe me if I told them I was. Meanwhile, most of my student’s parents are raking in more money than I probably ever will, does that make them more Jewish than me?
Oh and we got pizza at work today and it came with a star of David on it? I am not sure if it is just meant to look nice or if it is the Korean way to observe Chanukah. The pizza did have bacon on it though so I'm going to assume it was a non-kosher star of David pizza.